Dear Olympic Sponsors,

I severely wish Tide would quit making the commercials that appeal to daughters who've played sports. If I tear up during one more commericial that initially attracks an emotional response due to the sad, classical music and video real of a mom-chearing on her struggling athletic daughter and then, finally, watching as her daughter made it to the olympics winning gold (always gold) and the daughter, hugging her mom at the finish line, realizing the always obvious fact that she (the selfless, kaki wearing, minivan driving, "I did this for you, but would never say it," SOB) was her truest supporter and sacrificer throughout her childrood-I swear I'm going to literally send my mom ten to twenty heart emojis.

Because nothing in this world says, "thank you for all that you have put aside for my dreams and my future" like a heart emoji. You're welcome mom; now, I'm hungry and the basement is getting drafty so please make me a sandwich while you turn up the heat. 

Sincerely,

the daughter with the worthless Language Arts degree